Capturing Tom and Marie's real connection
What started as a deep dive into my photography archive turned into something much more meaningful than I could have imagined. I wanted to show my children something they might not always see in the moment: that even in silence, distraction, or disagreement, their bond is unshakable.
This project is a visual love letter to siblinghood.
A deeply personal photo project capturing the growing bond between my two children over 17 years. A story of trust, teasing, silence, and love — even when unspoken. See what’s hidden in plain sight.
Without words, always us
Over the past few months, I’ve taken part in The Archive — a workshop by the wonderfully talented (and endlessly patient!) Kristine Nyborg, a seasoned photo editor with years of experience in editorial storytelling. That is why I am writing this blog in English. With her sharp eye and gentle nudges, I sifted through tens of thousands of images spanning nearly 18 years — looking not for perfection, but for feeling. For moments that stopped me in my tracks. The ones that made me smile, or pause, or made me feel something.
From that vast body of work, a story emerged. A quiet, honest, powerful story.
This project is a visual love letter to the connection of siblinghood — told through the evolving relationship of my two children, Tom and Marie, over the course of 17 years.
When I showed them the final slideshow, my son was visibly moved. After a big hug, he asked, “Are you going to share this?” I replied, “Only if you both want me to.”
He didn’t hesitate: “DO IT.”
And Marie? She smiled and nodded.
She was in too — though not before she asked me to tweak a photo just a little before I could show it.
She has her standards — and I love that.
That moment meant everything.
Because this story — it’s not just mine to tell. It’s theirs, too.
The heart of this story: sibling connection
At the heart of this project lies the bond between my children, Tom and Marie. A dynamic dance of playfulness, teasing, growing pains, struggle, support, and unconditional love. A connection that’s often hard to put into words — yet becomes beautifully clear in the loud playful moments, the quiet ones, and the subtle gestures.
As they moved from childhood into adolescence, their bond shifted — sometimes subtle, sometimes stormy. Even when they live seemingly side by side, in a world filled with distractions, headphones on, eyes locked on screens, and each on their own island, it’s easy to miss the gentle ways in which they still see and support each other. But connection is always there — in between the noise. In the laughter, the whispered secrets, the eye rolls, in shared jokes, and spontaneous bursts of silliness and kindness.
I see it. But above all, I want them to see it too. The unspoken love. The depth of trust. The playfulness and the (sometimes endless!) teasing — it’s all part of the beautifully imperfect, ever-changing relationship they share. I wanted to show them the strength of their bond, even in the quiet, unspoken moments.
I see how they give each other space — even when the noise is too loud — and how they help one another out. Whether it’s tackling the next part of a high ropes course or navigating a tricky situation.
Our daughter sometimes feels like her big brother doesn’t see her anymore.
But I do.
And now — so can they.
Their connection isn’t loud, quite or perfect. But it’s real. And it’s theirs.
This series exists to remind them — and others — that connection doesn’t always shout. And it’s not always in the words spoken, about grand gestures, “Insta-worthy” moments or the obvious gestures of affection. Sometimes, it shows up in the little things: a glance, a shared laugh, quiet resilience, silly teasing, or simply being there — without a word, but present.
Connection doesn’t always shout. Sometimes, it just shows up — quietly present, saying: I’m here.
And connection doesn’t always whisper either. Sometimes, it bursts out laughing. It storms through a room, makes up silly dances, sings out loud, argues over who took the last snack — or who’s going to let out the dog (Pim’s got opinions, too). It lives in those everyday -ordinary- moments: shared conversations, chaotic meals, unexpected hugs, and fierce loyalty.
The beauty of the messy middle
This work exists not only for my kids — but for every parent who wonders whether they’re capturing what matters most. It’s for families who want to see the love that lives in the messy middle. The in-between. The moments that hide in plain sight. The imperfect but heartfelt.
This is a record of the little gestures, the looks, the touches. I want you to see what I see:
- The love
- The trust
- The playful chaos
- The silent support
Because real connection, real relationships — especially between siblings — are never just one thing. They’re a million things at once. Honest, tender, wild, frustrating, loud, beautifully unpredictable, hilarious, ever-changing. And that’s what makes it beautiful.
Not perfect, but perfectly ours.
Want to know more about how I work, or whether this fits your family?
A reminder for all of us
Through this project, I hope to normalize the real.
The dynamic, unposed, beautifully honest reality of siblinghood and family life. To show how love lives in both the loud and subtle — often unnoticed — ways connection takes shape in everyday moments.
That’s what documentary family photography is all about:
Preserving your family’s journey, the real way. Capturing the beauty of life as it unfolds, in all its honesty. The laughter. The boredom. The tenderness. The everyday choas. The magic. And a whole lot of Love. All of it.
It’s there — always. Without words. Always us. They don’t need to say it out loud.
A note to expat families: why this matters even more
As someone who grew up abroad — 15 years of my childhood spent in countries like Peru, Indonesia, and Bangladesh— I know how fleeting certain seasons of family life can feel when you’re far from “home”.
When you live abroad, the backdrop changes, but the moments with your family become the anchors of your memory.
I remember some of them because my father took photos. Not staged ones. But real, lived-in, in-between moments. That’s how our family history is remembered.
This is exactly why documentary family photography is so powerful — also for expats. It helps you:
- Preserve the everyday that feels ordinary now, but extraordinary later
- Give your children a visual memory of this chapter of their lives
- Tell the story of how your family showed up for each other, in a foreign land, making it your own
“Home isn’t always a place. Sometimes, it’s a look, a laugh, a shared snack, a Sunday morning dance party.”
Whether you’re living in the Netherlands for a few years or a lifetime, these are the moments worth remembering.
Let’s capture your family connection — not perfect, but perfectly yours.
Curious what a Day in the Life or Vacation-session like this could look like for your family? Want to know more about who I am, how I work, and how I can help you?
I know these are in Dutch, translate with the Google Translate plugin that appears on this page or call me and we can chat further!
Check out my YouTube channel for Day in the Life sessions or take a peek at my portfolio for other documentary photos I’ve created.
Let’s create your own version of “Without Words, Always Us” — captured in all its beautiful, emotional, messy realness.
